Live With Intention
What does it mean to live intentionally? How do you live intentionally? According to Merriam-Webster intention is defined as “a determination to act in a certain way” (2019). I believe that the way to live your best life is to live with intention. To know what you value and then act in a way that honors your values.
Values
For instance, if I value family above all else, but work late every evening and on weekends leaving me with no time for family - I may not be living intentionally. Do I really have to work late every evening and on weekends? Maybe the answer is yes. I’m working overtime right now because my family wants to buy a sailboat so that we can spend our weekends and vacations sailing. This is only a temporary state of affairs while I save up the money for a down payment on a small sailboat. In this case, I am living intentionally - I’ve made a choice to work extra hours today so that I can spend quality time with my family doing something we really enjoy later.
However, if the answer is yes, my boss expects it of me and if I don’t do it I’ll lose my job; I’m probably really miserable. I’m harboring resentment towards my boss. I miss my family. And I’m tired all of the time so even the few minutes I do have each day with my family is spent with me not really attending to them. If I’m not doing anything about the situation and there is no end in sight (i.e., this isn’t temporary because we’re working on a one-time special project) then I’m not living intentionally. I’m not making choices that support my values.
Brainstorm Your Choices
You might be wondering - well what choice do you have? You have to earn a living to support your family, you can’t allow yourself to get fired! It’s true, I do have to support my family; however, I do have some choices available to me. Now comes the hard part - I have to brainstorm - I have to figure out what choices are available to me. Here’s what I came up within just a few minutes:
I can talk to my boss and tell him that this isn’t working for me - he may not even hold this expectation. I only think he does because that’s the story that I’ve made up because he always works late and on weekends.
I could ask if we could hire a part-time person to cover the extra hours that I’m working.
I could ask to transfer to another department/division.
I could begin looking for another job outside of my company.
These are just a few of the options available to me. If I spent more time on this and/or I asked a friend or family member to help me brainstorm, I could likely generate a list of 15 to 20 actions I could take!
Take It Slow
The rub for most of us is that we don’t stop to examine options. We believe that we’re stuck with the status quo and so we continue living a mediocre life at best. I know that you want so much more for yourself than a mediocre life; you want to live your best life. So, take some time and identify your values. Is it family? If so, are you intentionally prioritizing your family in the choices that you make each day? Are there things that you are doing that you feel you have to do but which do not support your values?
Living intentionally means first and foremost paying attention - paying attention to what you value. It means slowing down. Slow down long enough to assess the decisions you’re making and how they line up with your values. So much of the time we are just acting or doing without thought, or at least with very little thought.
So slow down and pay attention. Look at your values and look at your choices - where do they line up? Where don’t they and what will you do about it? What are you going to do differently so that you can live your best life?
