Maintaining a Positive Attitude while Practicing Social Distancing

Written By Alexis Bernard

COVID-19 has radically changed our lives. A few months ago, none of us would have thought that our 'world' would be reduced to our homes.  That something as simple as going to the grocery store would become an unusual occurrence that we needed to carefully plan for – ensuring we had a face covering and gloves before entering the store.

This crisis is a powerful reminder of how important our freedom to choose is - and how much we need human connection!

Remember you are not alone. This is a GLOBAL health crisis, and everyone is impacted! Your neighbors, coworkers, family members, and friends, as well as your fellow humans around the world, are all going through something similar.

So, it's important to remember:

“Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but by how we react
to what happens, not by what life brings to us, but by the attitude
we bring to life. A positive attitude causes a chain reaction
of positive thoughts, events, and outcomes. It is a catalyst,
a spark that creates extraordinary results.” – Wade Boggs

Learning how to create and maintain a positive attitude is the challenge each of us must rise to! If we are going to be stuck at home, we may as well make the most of it and pursue a positive attitude so that we can each create our own extraordinary results!

HERE ARE 15 THINGS YOU CAN DO TO CREATE AND MAINTAIN A POSITIVE ATTITUDE WHILE SOCIAL DISTANCING:

1) Be in the moment:

SAVOR the moment. Relish or luxuriate in whatever it is that you’re doing right now – maybe you're taking a bath, eating a piece of pie, or basking in the sun. Maybe you’re listening to music, listening to your child read, or watching your dog chase a butterfly. Be in the moment, be present.

Studies show that people who take a few minutes each day to actively savor something they typically hurry through begin experiencing more joy, happiness, and other positive emotions and fewer symptoms of depression.

Remember, at THIS moment you are OK. You are safe. Take one day at a time - one hour or even one breath at a time if you need to. This tip is about being super-present, not thinking ahead or remembering the past, but practicing BEING. This is a PRACTICE - meaning you will have to do it over and over again - bringing yourself back to the NOW. Over time it gets easier, and it's a great skill to have to take back to "normal" life.

So, when you notice you're worrying, feeling twitchy, and want to pick up your device and find out what the "latest" is about the COVID situation, say to yourself, "It's OK, at this moment, I am safe. At this moment I am OK." You can also add or say, "At this moment, my children/husband/family are safe."

EXTRA TIP: Reduce or minimize how often you watch and read the news. And DON'T read or watch the news (or articles about COVID-19 or similar) just before bed.

2) Create a Healthy, Supportive Routine:

When we feel powerless or helpless (as so many of us do right now), one EXTREMELY easy thing to do is to create a routine or schedule.

While we're all stuck anxiously waiting at home, it's easy to lose our sense of time. Days can begin to blend into each other. A routine can give us an anchor and a greater sense of control over our lives. And if you have children, creating a routine is especially important to give them a sense of normality.

Your morning routine is particularly important because how you start your morning sets the tone for the rest of your day. An attitude-boosting morning routine that puts you in a good mood allows you to start your day off right! In your daily routine be sure to include social time, exercise, outdoor time and some learning or creativity so you get some benefit from this challenging time. It's also important to recognize weekends because it's too easy for weeks to blur together.

So, make a looser schedule for your weekends. Create a routine for a sense of control and mastery over your environment and life circumstances. Reclaim what power you can over your life, because with all this uncertainty it's important for you - and especially important for children - to have predictability.

3) Build Your Physical Strength, Fitness Levels, and/or Flexibility:

Building your physical strength is powerful and health-boosting! Not only is physical strength and flexibility life-affirming and good for our health but feeling more physically powerful actually helps us feel more empowered and less helpless in life too!

Add some physical activity into your schedule - as little as 15 minutes daily. Maybe by the end of this you'll be fitter or even be able to do 10 (or 100!) push-ups! There are many options to boost your physical strength and health. Here are some ideas:

  • Take up a yoga practice - excellent for strength-building, flexibility - and calm! There are lots of online options. One online option with everything from 10 minutes for beginners to advanced practice. Sarah Beth Yoga on YouTube has more (free) yoga videos than I can count.

  • Take a fitness class - there are so many online fitness classes on YouTube - for beginners, and experts - with equipment and also with no equipment whatsoever. PopSugar Fitness has many options to choose from.

4) Learn with Non-Fiction Books:

Use this time at home to educate yourself with non-fiction books. There is so much to be gained - like self-confidence, negotiation skills, health (sleep, nutrition), how to have difficult conversations, and much more. What keeps you up at night? There's probably a book about that! What do you wish you were better at? There's probably a book about that too!

Here are some book ideas to get you thinking:

Upload positivity to your brain! Read books with a positive message, listen to music with uplifting lyrics, and watch movies in which the protagonist’s optimism helps him/her to overcome obstacles and win, despite the odds. Change your attitude for the better by uploading as much positivity into your brain as you possibly can.

5) Watch your Words:

Use positive words when you talk to yourself. Studies have found that positive self-talk can boost your willpower and help you psych yourself up when you need to get through a difficult task. In addition, it can calm you down when you’re worried or anxious. If you want to change your attitude from “I can’t do this” or “I’m going to fail”, to “I’ve got this” or “I’m going to do great”, change your self-talk.

6) Gain a New Skill with Online Learning:

There are so many opportunities online to gain a new skill and they're growing by the day! Grow your personal or creative skills or choose a new skill to learn and take back to work with online training providers like Coursera or Udemy. In addition to these two- there are many other providers.

If there's a skill you always wanted to learn, search for it. But be sure to read the course descriptions thoroughly, check reviews if there are any - and check money-back guarantees as you need to! And with so many learning options ranging from FREE to tens of dollars to the low hundreds of dollars, there will be something out there just perfect for you.

7) Explore your Life Vision/Purpose:

Rather than watching endless news streams, you can choose to focus on a bigger picture - your future. What do you want for the rest of your life? What would you be disappointed if you did NOT do? Where do you envision yourself in 10 years?

Having a purpose in life gives you a fixed point on the horizon to focus on so that you can remain steady amid life’s vicissitudes and challenges. Bringing meaning and purpose into your life—knowing why you are here—will do wonders for your attitude. A clear vision of how you want your life to be is a powerful motivator. It helps us work towards our goals, take action, and make changes.

Soon, we'll all be super-busy again - and understanding your purpose and knowing your vision might be just what you need to stay focused! Here are 5 questions to ponder or journal around to go deeper:

  • What do you desire or yearn for in your life?

  • How do you want to feel?

  • What do you really, really want to be different in your life?

  • What would have happened in 3 years’ time such that your life is spectacular, and you feel magnificent about yourself?

  • What's your dream for this lifetime? Imagine you're 90 years old and looking back over your life; what did you do that made you proud and happy?

EXTRA TIP: Remember to think possibility, not probability! Don't limit yourself and your ideas because you don't believe something is likely. Instead, believe it's possible - and even if you don't get all the way there, you may get close - or even find something better along the way!

If you like guided meditation, you can meet yourself 20 years from now over at Fierce Kindness in this 20-minute guided meditation, "Still Lake", ask any questions you have, and receive a 'gift'!

8) Take Responsibility and Be Proactive:

At any moment you can choose to have the attitude of a victim or of a creator. The first step you need to take to shift from victim mode to creator mode is to take responsibility. This is the attitude of a creator:

  • I create my life.

  • I am responsible for myself.

  • I’m in charge of my destiny.

A reactive person allows others and external events to determine how they will feel. A proactive person decides how they will feel regardless of what may be going on around them. Be proactive by choosing your attitude and maintaining it throughout the day, regardless of what the day may bring.

9) Laugh:

Distracting ourselves from our fears is a valid technique for feeling better! According to the Mayo Clinic, laughter enhances your intake of oxygen-rich air, stimulates your heart, lungs, and muscles, and increases the endorphins that are released by your brain. Activate and relieve your stress response. A rollicking laugh fires up and then cools down your stress response, and it can increase and then decrease your heart rate and blood pressure.

Laughter isn't just a quick pick-me-up, though. It's also good for you over the long term. Laughter may improve your immune system, relieve pain, increase personal satisfaction, and improve your mood. So, whether you're guffawing at a sitcom on TV or quietly giggling at a newspaper cartoon, laughing does you good. People who know how to laugh at themselves and at life’s absurdities have a great attitude. Your sense of humor is a powerful tool, and you can use it to lift your mood and enhance your emotional state at any time.

10) Start a Journal:

If you've always wanted to journal, now is a good time to start. More than just keeping a record of your day, a journal can help you explore and sift through your feelings and experiences and learn from them. It's a great way to get to know you.

It's great to choose a beautiful notebook, but the most important thing is to just get started. Here are some prompts to get started:

  • Today I am feeling _________. I think this is because __________.

  • One big thing I have learned during this crisis is _________.

  • I remember the last time I was stuck in the house _________.

  • One thing that's surprised me recently is _________.

  • What matters most to me in life is _________.

  • Describe your ideal day _________.

“Journal writing gives us insights into who we are, who we were, and who we can become.” - Sandra Marinella.

11) Be Kind:

According to the Mayo Clinic, there is a science behind the phenomenon of "loving-kindness." And research shows that learning and practicing loving-kindness can profoundly affect your attitude, outlook, and even your health. You can rewire your brain to be more present and kinder to others, giving your mood a daily boost.

When we practice kindness, we change for the better -- and so does our world. Kindness is one of those happiness paradoxes, whereby we become happier by making other people happier.

Use kindness to give yourself - and others - the benefit of the doubt. Instead of getting upset when you see other people behaving badly, remember that we all do silly things when we're scared.

  • Imagine you have a kind, wise self. A part of you that is unflappable, intelligent, and unconditionally loves ALL of you. Now, when you need it, imagine that kind, wise self is with you, supporting you, maybe giving you a hug - and saying exactly what you need to hear (not just the sugary stuff, but also the tough love and common sense).

12) Help Others:

Helping others is empowering and makes us feel better. Here are a few ways you could help others:

  • Check in on a neighbor or friend and see if they need anything. You can do this by phone, or in person, remembering to maintain a 6 feet distance.

  • Offer to get someone groceries if you're going.

  • Help someone less technically savvy learn how to use Zoom or WhatsApp or whatever they need to get online.

  • Host a virtual get-together with your regular friends.

  • Reconnect more deeply with friends or relatives who Have moved away.

13) Live Your Values:

When we know our values, we understand what motivates and drives us. When we build our lives around our values, we create a life that is meaningful. Finally, when we align our actions with our values - we're being truly authentic. It's a very satisfying and fulfilling way to live.

And, living our values could be the single most important thing any of us can do right now.

Here's an exercise you can do:

  • List your values on a piece of paper or in your journal.

  • Give each value a score between 0 and 10 as to how well you are living that value in your life now (where 0 is not at all and 10 is full-out).

  • For the scores that are 8 or more - great!

  • For the scores that are 7 or less out of 10, ask yourself, "How could I express this value more in my life right now?" "What could I do differently or approach differently, so that I feel good about how I live this value in my life?"

For example, you have a value of creativity, but you're only managing to “go through the motions” right now and your score is 4/10. Ask yourself how you could be more creative during this time - whether it's cooking, gardening, art or writing, helping your kids do something creative, or even watching a documentary about someone creative you admire...

14) De-Clutter:

I bet you have some organizational things on your to-do list (like going through winter clothes, sorting out toys to donate, or tidying the laundry closet, garage, or shed) that have been on there for a while. Use this isolation period to get them done!

Getting organized and de-cluttering allows us to exert some control over our lives - and therefore feel less helpless! Plus, it'll feel amazing just to have it done. Organize your closets, your garage, your books, your photos, your office, and kitchen equipment. Whatever needs organizing. Or perhaps you need to go through your receipts or file your taxes!

If you need some inspiration (and great clothes-folding tips) you could watch the Marie Kondo series on Netflix!

A simple 3 Step Method to go through your stuff:

  • If you're keeping it, be sure to DECIDE where it will "live" from now on.

  • If you're not keeping it, create two piles:

    • Things to DUMP

    • Things to DONATE (and if relevant to pass on to specific people).

  • When you're done, put each pile into bags or boxes, and then once this crisis is over you can get rid of what you no longer need.

EXTRA TIP: You don't need to do any of this 'in one sitting', do an hour a day - you'll be surprised how much you get done if you keep it up for a week!

15) Begin a Meditation Practice:

Meditation can help you to become more adaptable and flexible in all situations. It is the secret to harnessing the power of positive thinking. By opening your heart and mind, meditation provides lasting feelings of peace and serenity while creating tremendously positive changes in your life.

When we meditate, we inject far-reaching and long-lasting benefits into our lives: We lower our stress levels, we get to know our pain, we connect better, we improve our focus, and we're kinder to ourselves.

There is a lot to learn about meditation - and it's called a Meditation Practice for a reason. But it's also not as hard as it sounds. You can start with as little as 5 minutes a day - and it's good to build a routine, so you meditate at the same time every day. There are a lot of tools out there to help you learn how to meditate - you can download an app for your smartphone or tablet or get a book on meditation.

If you’ve been wanting to learn how to meditate but don't know where to start, let this comprehensive guide for beginners show you the way at https://theconsciouslife.com/how-to-meditate-a-guide-for-beginners.htm.

WRAP-UP

I know that this is a challenging time and I also know that each of us gets to wake up every morning and choose our attitude. Then we get to do it again and again throughout our day. Yes, attitude is a choice and we can make the choice to have a positive attitude moment by moment, hour by hour, and day by day.

So, which of the above ideas resonated with you? The areas I am focusing on are practicing kindness, decluttering, meditation, journaling, and regular sessions with my coach. I’ve found that when I meditate and journal regularly, I have a much better handle on my inner world which allows me to focus on maintaining a positive attitude. This, in turn, allows me to more easily and genuinely practice kindness with those around me.

Since COVID 19, like everyone else, I’ve been spending more time at home and have come to realize that the clutter in my house isn’t serving me and in fact has been distracting me from living my values, so I’ve been spending time decluttering. Regular sessions with my coach keep me on track with the outcomes that I’ve set for myself and help me to ensure that even during this time of isolation and social distancing I am still taking steady and consistent action towards my goals.

Believe you have the skills and power to tackle this situation and you will! Choose to make the best of a difficult situation and no matter what - you'll find a way. This current and strange COVID-19 situation will end. And when it does, you'll be proud you made the effort to create and maintain your new positive attitude!

Alexis Bernard https://intentionallyme.org/
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